Was feeling really sick again today! My hands wouldn't stop shaking from 2pm til well into the evening. Finally calmed down when I went out with Sarah and Brendan for Bill Maher. Feeling better now but still hesitant to really eat. Will try peanut butter for lunch tomorrow and see.

Stupid mother called last night. Uncle John is dying of pancreatic cancer. of course, it's all MY fault and if only I was a good child who stayed home and helped her fucked up family everything would be peaches and sunshine, cancer would cease to exist, and no one would ever die. I don't know what made me more upset. The fact she's a bitch or the fact she's a bitch that gets to me. No tarot cards today. Didn't feel my energy was right and I don't want to over read them.

Spike is chasing the words across the screen as I type them. A reason to go to bed with a smile on my face. :)


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